


congratulations

by hoseokmin



Series: multi-fandom songfics [4]
Category: Pentagon (Korean Band)
Genre: Closure, F/M, Hurt, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-30
Updated: 2017-03-30
Packaged: 2018-10-12 23:38:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10501842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoseokmin/pseuds/hoseokmin
Summary: Hongseok is getting married, and Changgu has to have closure before moving on.





	

_congratulations, you’re so amazing_

Hongseok looked gorgeous today. Of course he would, he's getting married. It twisted Changgu’s heart as he watched Hongseok smile pleasantly at alter, his eyes reflecting the fear in his eyes.

(and happiness, Hongseok was _almost_ always happy.)

Their eyes met and Changgu felt his breath catch. Flashbacks of their first meeting jumped in his mind, of college parties and stress and alcohol. Their relationship had been built on pent up sexual frustration being let out in dark alleyways, abandoned classrooms, and eventually their own beds -- but looking back, Changgu probably wouldn't have it any other way.

Hongseok had been perfect, amazing, brilliant-- all of the good adjectives you could think of. It wasn't hard for Changgu to fall for him, really, especially with that infectious smile. He had thought Hongseok had fallen for him too, especially considering the way he looked at him. Hongseok’s eyes always sparkled with adoration and hope of the future when they locked eyes with Changgu.

(Looking back now, Changgu would probably say it was more weed and less adoration and hope. Whatever.)

Changgu’s mind came back to reality as the ceremony started. He closed his eyes and bit his lip, trying not to let his emotions get to him. Not here, not now.

His breath caught, wishing someone would stop this madness. His mind whirred as he looked up at Hongseok, so beautiful and serene and happy. He can do this. He had to do this. For himself.

“...you may kiss the bride.”

Changgu walked outside as Hongseok kissed his new wife.

_how could you trample on me?_

It hurt still, Changgu admitted. He had moved on years ago, he had his own life now, but every time he revisited the pain that Hongseok left him with it felt as if it was new.

He remembered the night clearly, right before move out day of their senior year. Previously they had promised to find an apartment together. They had so many plans -- and maybe that's why it hurt so much. They had a future planned out and it wasn't good enough for Hongseok.

Hongseok came to their dorm, the stench of weed and alcohol and a floral perfume radiating off of him. Changgu wrinkled his nose and walked to Hongseok as he came in, smiling excitedly.

“Did you have too much fun there, Seok?” he teased him.

Hongseok rolled his eyes and plopped on his bed. “Duh.”

Changgu should've known by his actions that something bad was going to happen that night. But like a fool in love, he didn't catch on until the night went on and Hongseok had pushed him away for the fifth time.

“What's going on with you?!”

Hongseok scoffed. “Nothing,” he paused. “Actually, everything. You're suffocating me! Acting like a needy little bitch and fuck, I'm not even gay!!”

Changgu blinked at him. He didn't think he was acting needy, or like a bitch, and Hongseok was definitely at least bisexual. “What? Hongseok this isn't like you! What's really going on?!”

Hongseok looked at him, his eyes glossed with whatever he took before coming home. “I don't want you anymore, Changgu. I'm not gay and I don't want your life you carefully fucking planned for me. I don't want you. I don't want to see your damn ugly face!!”

Changgu felt his face get hot, he felt his tears threaten to fall, he felt as if Hongseok stabbed his heart with a knife and twisted it while laughing mockingly in his face. It was as if Hongseok had been possessed, it wasn't like him to say these things. As quickly as he could, he packed all of his things in a blur while Hongseok shouted at him.

He never dreamed Hongseok could be so filthy.

_I see your smiling face as you completely forgot about me_

  
Changgu walked into the reception an hour after the wedding ended. He snuck in a seat and watched everyone as they ate. He wasn't hungry.

It had been three years and Changgu could safely say he moved on. Someone had came into his life and taught him what real love was. He smiled as he thought about him-- his true angel. He let him come by himself today to officially close this chapter of his life.

(They were getting married soon themselves.)

The newlyweds gathered on the dance floor soon after. The bride was beautiful, he had to admit. What was her name? Seungyeon. Ah. Right. He felt no ill feelings toward her, not anymore. My life is perfect now.

Changgu watched Hongseok carefully, perhaps trying to find the slip of the mask the older always had on. No, he was truly happy. His smile never faltered, and he felt just a twinge of jealousy as he noticed the sparkle in Hongseok’s eyes as he looked at his new bride.

He used to look at me like that.

Or-- perhaps he didn't. Now that Changgu thought about it, perhaps Hongseok only looked at him like that when he was high, or drunk, or sleepy. He, himself, was just too blind to see it.

_How is she? Is she better than me?  
Did she erase all your memories about me?_

  
Changgu managed to get Hongseok by himself toward the middle of the reception. He hadn't wanted to stay that long, but he figured everyone would want to talk to the newlyweds. So he was patient.

When he saw Hongseok slip outside on the balcony alone, he made his move. Stepping outside and gently closing the door, Hongseok didn't flinch when he stood beside him.

“How'd you know I was getting married?” he simply asked. “I don't recollect inviting you.”

Changgu let out a shaky breath. “We still have mutual friends, you know. Jinho told me as soon as you proposed.”

Hongseok’s face turned into a scowl of disgust. Changgu frowned.

“I haven't come to sabotage you in anyway, Hongseok,” Changgu said gently, leaning against the railing of the balcony. “I just… needed closure. I can see you're happy. So am I.”

Hongseok sighed. “Why do you need closure, then? Since you're so happy.”

Changgu heard the hint of jealousy in Hongseok’s voice. “Because I loved you once. A part of me hates you for doing me the way you did, but there's a small part that still loves you. I don't know why--”

“Yeah, I don't know why either.”

“--but I do. And I just wanted to come here and try to forgive you because that's what I deserve. That's what my partner deserves.”

Hongseok snorted. Changgu sighed. “What happened to the sweet, loving Hongseok? The one that treats everyone well, even me?”

Hongseok didn't answer. His face was unreadable as he stared into the city skyline. “I don't think Seungyeon would like this Hongseok.”

The older looked at him, fire dancing in his eyes. Changgu blinked. “You don't know Seungyeon. She loves me for me.”

“Does she know about me, then?”

Hongseok’s mouth closed, his lips pressed in a thin line.

“Hongseok. Drop the facade and please, let's talk. I don't want you back, I'm not here for that. I just… want to know… why…”

Changgu turned away, afraid to show Hongseok weakness. There was a time where he wasn't afraid, he could bare his soul to Hongseok and he wouldn't be afraid at all.

It wasn't the same Hongseok he remembered.

They sat on the stools in the corner eventually, shielded away from wandering eyes. Hongseok made sure not to get too close to him.

“Did you forget about me?” Changgu asked after minutes of silence. “Ever? Did she help you forget me, or did you do that all your own?”

Hongseok didn't answer. He only twisted the wedding band in his finger, watching the glint of the lights as he did so.

“I just.. want you to know. You ruined me. I couldn't trust a soul after you did what you did. Used me, abused me, made me fall in love with you and for what? So you could string me along while you got your ‘gay sex’ experimentation thing out of the way?” Changgu felt his voice shake. “We were in a relationship for two fucking years, and you muck it up to some ‘phase’?!”

Hongseok let out a shaky, sad laugh. It made Changgu even more pissed.

“You also told our friends you didn't really love me, is that true? So after all those nights when you begged to be in my ass, you begged me to fuck you senseless and then whispered I love you so much afterward, it turns out to be a big fucking lie?!”

Hongseok winced. Silence engulfed them, making Changgu’s ears ring.

“I hate myself,” Hongseok admitted after minutes of more silence.

Changgu blinked. Damn right, you should hate yourself.

“I love Seungyeon more than I've ever loved anyone. She's helped me with so much, you know?” Way to bruise my heart even more, dickhead. “I'm sorry, it's true. I was going through a lot when… when the shit with all of us went down.”

Changgu didn't want to hear what he was going through, he really didn't. Thank god he didn't go into details. “She made me realize it was okay to be bisexual. She helped me…and yes, she helped me forget about you.”

Changgu felt his eyes water. “Not in the way you think, though,” Hongseok continued, “I was so awful. You didn't deserve the way I treated you in the end. It was so abrupt. At first I thought it was a dream, an awful nightmare--”

“But it wasn't.”

Hongseok sighed and looked at Changgu. “No, it wasn't. And I'm sorry, I truly am.”

Changgu looked back at him, their eyes locking. He felt a sense of relief, like a three year weight had lifted off his shoulders. He almost felt… free.

Changgu nodded. “That's all I needed to hear. Have a good life, Hongseok.”

He stood up to leave, stopping at the door. He looked back, staring at his past-- his heart, his stars, his scars and bruises. Hongseok stared back and he opened his mouth, closing it and walking out.

_congratulations_

**Author's Note:**

> -loosely based on [congratulations](https://youtu.be/x3sFsHrUyLQ) by day6  
> -thanks [@kinomoney](http://www.twitter.com/kinomoney) for the suggestion  
> -follow me on twitter ([@1wonh0)](http://www.twitter.com/1wonh0)if you want :)
> 
> If anyone has any suggestions on songs/fandoms, please let me know!! My creativity is lacking atm ;; 
> 
> I love you all and thanks for reading <3 kudos and comments are appreciated!!!


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